Stop Wearing Your Wishbone

Independent: (adj.) not depending on another for livelihood or subsistence.

This word really hits home to me. I feel like, as a girl in her 20’s, belonging to someone or something and feeling a sense of security within another being is one of our biggest desires. We fight to have the acceptance of someone and to be able to pour ourselves into them and them pour themselves into us. The interdependence is what we crave.

Although my desires for this is obviously in my nature, my independence has recently shown through more than ever. Juggling class, work, friends, homework, budgets, and additional responsibilities can be overwhelming at times, especially when you feel as if you are alone.

But you’re not alone. It’s sometimes hard to see how many people you are surrounded by who are there to help you and lift you up and encourage you when you feel like you are on your last straw. The support that is around us is being barricaded by our desires to have something that we don’t. Long story short: we always crave better things because we feel as if what we have now is never good enough.


Elizabeth Gilbert said it best. Instead of wishing for someone to come along and sweep us off of our feet or for our next big internship to simply fall into the palm of our hands, why don’t we change that wish into a work? Your backbone is there for a reason, and you do not need anyone to do things for you. Why? Because you are strong enough to do things yourself.

My major isn’t the only thing that has changed these past three years that I have attended college. I strongly believe that being independent is one of the most rewarding facets that I have acquired. It helped me to find what I truly wanted to do and it allowed me to build a firm act of determination to do it. So don’t let your interdependence that you have with others hold you back from going that extra mile. By not being blindsided with the support and encouragement of those around you, it’s easy to forget that the only person that is holding you back from anything that you want to accomplish is yourself.


Until you are happy with who you are as a whole before finding someone who compliments you, you will never be fully satisfied. So, plant your own gardens. Decorate your own soul. Don’t wait for someone to bring you flowers. Because being content with where you are as an independent being is the first step.



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